A friend of mine has been interviewing for jobs recently. This reminded me of a couple of job interview stories.
I interviewed for my current job on my birthday, when the job was in Michigan. Exiting I-75 in Saginaw I was almost sideswiped by an enormous customized Chevy van. The adrenaline rush of the near miss had got my mind off the interview and actually calmed me down. I had to meet with a project manager, a line manager and human resources. The first person I talked to was the project manager. We met via video conferencing as he was in Washington. The first words out of his mouth were "You're the guy I want to hire and I control the budget so the rest of the interview is a formality." That also calmed me down.
From that point on my biggest worry was whether I would get back to Bowling Green in time for the Maniac and Glen or Glenda double feature at the Dorothy and Lillian Gish Theater, which was located two floors below my office. That's the 1934, pre-code exploitation movie Maniac, which must be seen to be believed (note: cat lovers may find a couple scenes too disturbing), and should not be confused with the early 80s slasher flick of the same name.
But the real story I want to tell is about the guy who interviewed to replace me at Bowling Green. The standard procedure is for interviewees to fly into Toledo, where a faculty member picks them up and brings them to BG, getting an extra half-hour of one-on-one conversation. In this case the candidate booked a flight into Detroit and reserved for a rental car. Berry, the head of the environmental studies program explained beforehand that the department wasn't paying for the rental but the guy insisted.
The guy calls Berry around noon, telling him he's arrived at the Detroit airport. Berry says something like "Okay, we'll see you around one-thirty". The candidate pauses and explains that he may be late as he's meeting his mother for lunch in Monroe, which is about 45 miles from the airport. Berry's thinking that's kind of weird, but they guy had impressive credentials and references, and on paper was a good fit with the departmental needs, so I'll cut him some slack.
Guy calls up an hour later. He's about to leave his mother's place and is driving straight to BG. It's a good 45 miles away. Ten minutes later he walks into Berry's office. Now, Berry's an easygoing guy but he doesn't take to having his chain pulled, so he asks the obvious question "How did you get here so fast?"
The guy hems and haws and manages to change the subject.
The rest of the interview goes well. He meets with the faculty and the dean. He gives a class lecture and meets with the students. He gives a seminar for the faculty. He's very personable, the faculty are impressed, the students give him raves. The interview is successful enough that the weird timing thing from the day before has mostly been forgotten.
The candidate and Berry are in Berry's office waiting on some paperwork before the guy leaves. Partly as part of the interview and partly just to make conversation, Berry asks the guy what research he has been doing while on sabbatical that year.
Major hemming and hawing and evasiveness and vagueness and ohmygoodnesslookatthetimeIbetterleaveorI'llmissmyflightbye. He signs the paperwork and is out the door.
After the guy leaves, Berry's head is spinning in an incredulous "what just happened?" mode. He's also pissed because he has to make a hiring recommendation to the dean in a couple of days. Everyone else thinks he was great. Berry's the only person who experienced this guy's weirdness.
So he calls the chair of the candidate's department and asks what the guy has been doing on his sabbatical. The chair corrects Berry slightly, the guy is on leave, not sabbatical. Berry asks again about what research the guy is conducting while not teaching.
Once again, but this time from the chair, much hemming and hawing and evasiveness.
Now Berry's livid, and starts yelling at the chairman. It was months after this all happened that he told me the story and I can still see the anger in his eyes.
The chair finally admits the guy is not on sabbatical, he's on involuntary leave. He's banned from campus because, late one night at the beginning of the semester, he was caught peeking into a woman's dorm.
For the second time.
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